


My Heart Will Go On

by AmazingGraceless



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Angst, Ben Solo mcfreakin’ dies, F/M, Mourning, Speculation, Well this aged like milk
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-26
Updated: 2015-12-26
Packaged: 2021-03-10 22:28:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,540
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28054638
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AmazingGraceless/pseuds/AmazingGraceless
Summary: “You sacrificed yourself for me.”
Relationships: Kylo Ren/Rey, Rey/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren
Comments: 7
Kudos: 4





	My Heart Will Go On

Rey clenched her teeth and focused on pushing the tall creature in front of her into the shaft of the Bast Castle that led to the center of the destructive weapon in the heart. Despite being twenty-five feet tall, she managed to push Snoke into it. His screams echoed as he toppled further and further down. Quickly, Rey hurled her activated saber-staff down the shaft and controlled the descent to cut off the limbs of the demonic creature.

She then pulled it back up. After being certain that the creature that had ruined both of their lives was destroyed, she urged sharply to see the Knight of Ren that was the shatterpoint of her heart. He beat on the wound through his stomach as blood dripped to the ground. She stared at the object of her affections that she wanted to push off a cliff and run to the bottom to catch immediately afterwards. He slid down the wall.

"You sacrificed yourself for me," Rey said softly as she walked over. She knelt down beside him. He stared up at her, making his helmet seem more lifeless than ever. Her hands went to the cold material of the helm and she pulled it off as gently as she could manage. She sucked in her breath, unable to stomach the stench of blood.

She then tossed the helmet to the ground with a hollow clack.

She was met by the intensely blazing eyes of Ben Solo. Yet she could not look away. The thought kept repeating itself in her mind, _he's dead, he's dying, he'll soon be dead._ Once, she would've wanted this day to come. She would've wanted her greatest enemy dead two years ago, but something had changed. The nights alone, when she'd feel his presence comforting her after a nightmare, the bond in the Force that they shared, the soft spot she'd realized he had for her. Then she saw how he had begun to change. Sparing more and more innocent people, finding the light in general again, even if he constantly denied it.

Now, she didn't want him to leave. She wanted him to live and finish his redemption, to fully come back to the light, where he belonged. She could sense it, he now knew that he belonged. Unfortunately, it was too late.

That didn't mean that she wouldn't try. She slung his arm around her neck and started to drag him down the corridors of Vjun castle. She then realized that the Force would probably speed things along, and she started carrying him in midair with the Force. She could feel his pain in a dull way. She knew he was trying to keep it back, but she was opening up the door for comfort.

Eventually, the strain on her powers was too much and she dropped him in the hangar. She swore and picked him up manually and began dragging him down the hangar to the ship where Poe and Finn were waiting.

"What's he-" Finn asked, but Poe interrupted him.

"We need to help her," Poe said, and he and Finn jogged over to Rey. They helped her bring Ben into the ship. She set him down in the Millennium Falcon's sickbay and they all stood around him.

"W-Why didn't you leave me?" He asked as his hand reached out to Rey's face. "You should've left me there."

"I wasn't going to let you die alone," Rey assured him as her calloused finger traced the scar that she'd given him across his face. "No one deserves to die alone."

"I do," he muttered, closing his eyes. "I deserve to die in a much worse way than this. I only hope that my father could forgive me. Father, I'm coming to you now."

"Ben, don't say things like that," Rey admonished as she brushed strands out of his face. "If you'll just let me-"

"I know what dying feels like, Kenobi," he pointed out. "And believe it or not, I know when to give up."

His eyes flashed open and his gloved hand closed around her wrist. Rey cursed under her breath as the tears beaded up in her eyes. Once again, she could see the past in their bond, displaying where they began and how far they had come from where they had began.

"I can see them now."

He exhaled the words. Past Rey he stared, obviously seeing something she was unaware of. Then she heard the sound and turned around. She saw the bluish translucent figures of a gentle, weary woman in rags, a proud man with a scar on his face, a beautiful, sad young woman with curls, a man with a beard and an air of calm, and a young Han Solo waiting.

"It's time for me to go," Ben said as he let go of her hand.

"Please," Rey pleaded to her ancestors. "Please, let him stay, tell him it's not his time."

The proud man with the scar stepped forwards with an intense expression.

"Grandfather," Ben said hoarsely. "I misunderstood all these years. Forgive me."

"I always did," Anakin assured him. He faced Rey. "I once tried to reverse dying, after my mother died."

The woman in rags waved. Anakin looked back and smiled at Shmi, and then looked back at the girl.

"When I tried to save my wife from dying in labor, I ended up causing her death," Anakin continued as he put his arm around the beautiful woman. "I also ended up losing my best friend." His arm went around the bearded man.

"It's time for the circle to close," Shmi declared. "The Skywalker family will end tonight. But we were never supposed to be this way. It started with Plagueis manipulating my midichlorians to create a baby, and it will end with my great-grandson sacrificing himself."

Rey shook her head. "No, no," she cried. She turned back to Ben.

"Don't worry about me, Rey," he said. "One day, you'll become one with the Force, and we'll be together then. Hopefully you'll live a long life without me."

"Stay strong," the beautiful woman said. "Don't make the mistake I did. Let your heart carry him with you. Your heart will go on and on with him living within you."

"I'm ready when you are, son," Han said, outstretching his hand to take his son's hand.

Ben looked back at Rey.

"I'll love you until the day after forever."

He closed his eyes and Rey touched her lips to his. She tasted ice and snow, while his last breath tasted of the sun. She touched her forehead to his, wanting to imprint the moment to her soul forevermore. She shared that last breath with him in the Force.

_I love you._

_I love you._

_I love you._

She heard the sound again of when the ghosts had appeared, and saw Ben join the ranks of his family long gone. She pressed her fingers to her lips and outstretched them to his ghost. He smiled sadly, and they all faded away.

Finn and Poe watched as Rey, the strong granddaughter of Kenobi, Rey, the compassionate Jedi, Rey, the survivor on Jakku, Rey, the fighter who wasn't afraid of standing up for what she believed in and could never back down, slide to the ground, a fist in her mouth as she sobbed. They were dry sobs, a habit from Jakku. Or at least, she usually didn't cry actual tears.

Everyone was shocked to see water trail down her cheeks so freely, without nearly as much as a fight as she usually put up. She knew that there was nothing that she could've done, but that only made it worse.

"Set course for the base," Finn said quietly to Poe.

Poe nodded and walked to the cockpit. Finn knelt beside Rey, and he put an arm around here shaking shoulders.

"I never knew," Finn admitted. "That you cared that much about him."

"Neither did I," Rey sobbed. "But now he's gone."

Finn didn't know what to say. He didn't know how to deal with this version of Rey. All he could do was offer his presence and hope that she wouldn't object to it.

* * *

She insisted on going alone out to the dock Luke had set up.

"I have to do this alone," she'd insisted when Poe and Finn had insisted on helping her carry the body. The Force would be her only ally in this. She set the body down in a boat, and positioned the lightsaber in his hands over the stomach wound. She tenderly wrapped the cloak around him.

She then used her lightsaber to set the boat on fire. She got up to her knees in the water and pushed the boat off of the coast before the fire could spread to the back of the boat. She trudged out of the ocean that surrounded the islandic world.

In the flames she could see the ghosts dancing in the way of the dead. Rey placed her folded hands over her heart. She would heed Padmé's advice. Her heart would go on, for his memory now lived in the heart of his remaining family- Luke, Leia, and in a way of romance, her own.


End file.
